Samantha Silverman

August 27th, 2015

Stratford-upon-Avon

I Guess That This Must Be The Place

 I have always struggled with the concept of home. I’m not sure what that says about me, but only recently have I begun to value the place, the collection of people, that is my home, for what it is. I’m not sure if that is despite of or because of my looming – but also sudden – departure, but the place I grew up never felt more like home until it wasn’t.

  And it’s hard to rationalize whether home is where it was or if I now, in fact, reside in seat 33K, next to two, now former, strangers on a bus driving on what I still consider to be the “wrong” side of the road, or on a train going to and from somewhere with which I am entirely unfamiliar.

Regardless, I am here, and it is undoubtedly beautiful. And I am, without a question, out of place, from never failing to respond with “what?” after everything locals say, or almost getting hit while crossing the street because I impulsively looked left, yet again, forgetting to turn right.

But until things become permanent again (whatever length of time or state of mind actually defines permanence), this is now, and I am here, and even if my morning spring drives to school do not exist anymore, my dark blue suitcase does, and things and places I do not even know are real do, and I guess that is up for me to find out, for me to be open to receive and embrace the unknown.

Home

Is where I want to be

But I guess

I’m already there